You've been Googled

I am hoping like hell that 'bing' turns out to be crap. Because I won't use it.

Not for any logical reason, just because I haven't forgiven them for Vista.

I will not bore you all the actual problems with running the dog of a thing. What really pisses me off is that it was forced upon me. I needed new hardware. Why could I not have my old operating system on my new PC? Windows Whatever It Was (pre-Vista) had served me perfectly well, and wasn't that old. Why was it so unreasonable that I should expect to be able to choose? Couldn't I at the very least be given the choice to buy with no operating system at all, so I could have put my old one on? Apparently not. I must be forced to purchase an endless supply of frequent crashes and inexplicable stalls.

Impotent fury festers. Besides, its rare to have the opportunity to happily nurture resentment and turn the other cheek to the advances of that harlot Forgiveness without hurting a flea. Why would I want to give that away?

I found myself with a dilemma, though, after the nightly news have furnished the Big M with about 5 minutes worth of free advertising. What if 'bing' is actually better? A lot of my work depends on internet research. If it was good, there was a very real prospect of being forced to comply. The very thought makes me break out in a rash.

So I thought I would run a simple test and ask them both to find something obscure. I 'binged' myself. It sounds like a mild assault, like having a ping-pong ball bounced off your head. Then I Googled myself. More of an aural tickle, I think.

To my everlasting relief, I found that 'bing' disdains me as much as I disdain it. It most ardently prefers an American sociologist of the same name. Google knows the sociologist, and the kindergarten teacher, and the lawyer in Ohio who share my name, but it knows me as well.

It wins. Phew.